In NLP, flexibility is mainly seen as temporarily letting go of your own ideas and plans completely so that you can step into the perception of other people. For example, act and respond positively to positive things (for example, when a woman shows that she likes you), but not reactively / dependent, nor react reactively to negative things. In social conditioning, an entire country displays a certain behavior. What makes this an indispensable quality to have? A person can only take your self-esteem if you give it to him. How can we make the shift from reactivity to proactivity? Flexibility-type 1: towards the status quo. You cannot change the past. In this article you will find tips and examples of a proactive attitude, as well as properties of reactive people. Example: A group of 80 people wants to go from Eindhoven to Cologne. The supple ferns survive the wind storm, while the mighty oak tree breaks. Rather, it’s being in complete control over your emotions. Reactive Approach: The hotel takes no action, until repeated requests from guests to provide accommodation to their pets. So instead of responding, what do you do? Do it by the book, but be the author of the book! You are also on the cause side by making the most of it. It cant hurt you if you accept it. If Viktor managed to choose his response amongst the unimaginable conditions of the Nazi death camps, witnessing endless suffering and losing almost all of his family; surely we can do it in our everyday lives? Often times you indeed have to let go of your ego and adapt yourself to the system in order to get people with you or not to cause problems for yourself. Read on to Check Our Deals Blog: 10.000+ Tips Happiness. You just have to turn on the TV after sports matches and you will immediately hear in the interviews who is proactive and who is reactive. While all try to grasp them, there are very few who try to verify and learn by experimenting. I want to honor my teachers though: what you are reading is developed by people who worked hard on it. If it isn’t, it affects their attitude and performance. Reactive people are like characters in a movie, playing out the script. Read on to learn all the traits of proactive people …, The lessons on proactivity are perhaps the most important lessons from the famous book, The Seven Habits of Effective Leadership (Covey). It is your life and your body. The following statements of Louis van Gaal make it clear why: “Quality is the exclusion of coincidence.”, “We have top players and – sorry for being arrogant – a top coach.”, “You have to teach your people to look the way you want them to look.”, “I’m not going to change my personality just because others want to”, “I always try to get a finger on everything, but sometimes that doesn’t work.”, “I choose democratic leadership, but in the end I decide.”. It involves you becoming more aware of everything that is going on in the moment. Making goals and working towards them can help empower you and reinforce the control you have over your life. If you look closely, both words reactive and proactive have the root word active common in them. Here are some tips: Bad weather does not exist. 5 easy steps to get out of the friendzone, How to recognize if a man is in love [Signals & his body language], Processing Love Sickness [Quotes, Tips & Help] [Heartbreak], Free will and religion / theology [Verses & Quotes on free will]. On the other hand, a proactive one can anticipate the challenges your business might face at a specific moment in time. For most people, it’s the default program. Reactive people tend to use “I can’t”, “If only”, “I have to”. For better or worse, these are all examples of reactive behaviour, where our feelings depend on the results of external events or processes that we have no control over. Because you let him insult you. “I have to do this because…”. Do not let themselves be guided by fast, reactive impulses. Looked through the window to see rain and grey clouds, and decided it’s a miserable day. Your email address will not be published. And that, we are. [Tips & examples], Why are we living? Someone on the entourage side would say, “They’re not going to do this to me again.”, Someone on the cause side would say, “I’m not going to let this happen to me again.”. If you listen to the statements of these trainers, you will hear who is proactive and who is reactive. With that you adapt yourself so that you prevent problems and can communicate better with people without other people thinking weird about you. The internal is stronger than the external. You are then willing to look for another solution that you have not done before. Intuition / 6th Sense: How To Develop & Follow It? Stoic philosophy promoted the idea of concerning yourself only with the things you could influence — your thoughts and your actions. It is wiser to light a candle than to complain about the darkness. Did you have a shitty day? Remember that your perception is stronger than your circumstances. Proactive people know that they are best off if they quickly reach for solutions when there is a disability. Reactive people focus their efforts in the Circle of Concern–things over which they have little or no control: the national debt, terrorism, or the weather. Notice your reactive behaviour when it occurs, in the moment. Also within the ‘cultural system’ it is good to adhere to the etiquette and customs of the system. My, for the obstacles that come with it every day. In some cases you should not do what is expected of you, but instead do your extra best or break the pattern and choose a different route. Mahatma Gandhi, It’s not your job to love me. They work on the things they can do something about: health, children, or problems at work. For example, a reactive statement is: “I am nog allowed to come. Out of the Box solutions can then be created. 4. Consciously change these to more positive, empowering phrases. Just the everyday situations; in work perhaps, or in your relationships. For example, you can break through patterns to solve psychological and practical problems. Proactive behavior, what does that actually mean? Only our judgments of those events make them good or bad, and we are free to choose. examples of a proactive attitude, as well as properties of reactive people. If you start pushing against an unexpected, and in any case unchanging no, you will suffer and miss out on other opportunities. Notice your reactive behaviour. Sometimes a system can arise simply because everyone does the same. Reactive and Proactive are two terms between which a number of differences can be identified. – Byron Katie. In this article you will find tips and examples of a proactive attitude, as well as properties of reactive people. 2. Another person has control over what you feel, the other has control over whether you are happy or angry. These are proactive stu… Nothing in this life is worth worrying. You just have to turn on the TV after sports matches and you will immediately hear in the interviews who is proactive and who is reactive. Take a breath, take a step back, think … and only then come up with a response. How are you on the cause side? Thanks for reading these articles. The person who responds the least is the winning person. Are there any obstacles, such as a train rushing past the classroom? You are the only one who creates your reality. If I had the talent of others … ‘. In social conditioning, an entire country displays a certain behavior. The first form always goes first, so that you create support and momentum. “I can”, “I will”, “I want to”. And, You can tell from someone’s language how proactive that person is. If I didn’t have to work so hard for it. Instead, accept that you made them, take whatever you can learn from them, let them go, and move on. In that case you are flexible to achieve your result, obtaining a diploma. [9 Tips & Traits], Courage: How Can You Be Brave? ]. If I had a good education. Show this in everything you do, even through your tonality. How can you act proactively? Have a strong intention: be on the cause side! You can easily start following by, for example, mirroring physically and vocally, but after that you absolutely have to lead! If the weather is good, they feel good. If you’re dealing with a difficult individual, try to put yourself in the challenging person’s shoes, … It can also be done with a soft voice, but with the same power of a person who is on the cause side. Then you can be flexible in finding new unknown solutions, without resistance! A proactive person would simply communicate with people to get more information or to turn a situation into his / her advantage. 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